Sunday, 8 March 2015

Hola mis sujetos humanos

As the new owner of the Major Breakers, I thought I would introduce myself and give you an insight into the feline world. According to the humans, my name is Houdini. I’ve had worse names I suppose.

It certainly is a cat’s life here at Cabopino, especially when you are ‘Top Cat’, like me (none of this being more dog bobbins) and have the choice of so many luxurious awnings to slumber in of a chilly Spanish noche. There are plenty of foreign canines tied up for me to irritate and of course the weather is great for those day-long siestas I take.

The Major folk are pretty interesting characters, especially the one who claims not to like us cats. Aside from letting me sit on his lap, he has been showing me some of their human activities. I find these mildly entertaining, if not a little strange, but it takes all sorts I suppose.

Apparently you drink this stuff, but I couldn't fit my head in the cup.

This activity was rather fun, but the red one didn't really want to play.

I couldn't see the point of this game, but he played it for ages.

The short one needed some help with his maths but I preferred sniffing the chair.

After a full day of watching these strange occupations and several hours napping on my favourite seat, it is my custom to have a quick wander around the site to catch up with friends and grab a bite to eat.  One of the humans seems to think that I might like orange peel; she puts out fresh offerings every few days. I prefer the flesh rather than the peel though so I make sure I walk over it several times a day just so she knows that I appreciate the thought. I spray all around her pitch too, just to make she knows I’m still around.

All this for me, that woman sure does love me!

When these Major folk got here they seemed happy enough to have the honour of my esteemed company bestowed upon them by day but were in the habit of turfing me out of an evening. I soon corrected this by jumping on their roof and miaowing loudly through the vents until the door was opened by the tall one who looks after the food. She will even lift me down so I don’t have to bother jumping. I quite like the blanket she crocheted for me too and I sleep on it all night.

 I have my young apprentice to train, so I’ve started bringing him to the van with me in the early evenings. He won’t let the humans touch him and will bat their hands away with his paw when they extend a limb. His theory is to try and extract food using the wide-eyed technique. I’ve tried to tell him that my methods are far superior, I mean, look at the size of him compared to me, but he is young and thinks he knows it all. A few more weeks and I bet the female human would crochet him a blanket too.

Patience, young one. I will show you the ways of the force.

He's watched Shrek 2 too many times.

They tell me they’re leaving next week and will miss me. I am looking forward to the next comfy cushion for nap times and perhaps less of the short humans who will insist on picking me up just when I have got comfy. I am rather fond of the red one though. Although he tried to show me the human way, he has actually emulated my lifestyle while he’s been here, although I haven’t noticed him spraying on the orange peel yet. 

One of my favoured pastimes.

I got the red one to move the bricks so  I could get a better look.

Well, must go now, too much work wears me out. It's hot in Spain y'know. Adios amigos.


  1. that's the funniest thing I've read in a long time loved it but do you think the Spanish sun might be boiling your brain a little? xx


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